My body hates me right now. Partly from not taking as good care of it as I should. Partly from this IUD I got in, which the doctor says should help with my migraines and heavy periods. Anyway, the hormones are messing with me and my body hates me.
For the past month I have had insane cramping and pain – told it’s normal as the adjustment time for the contraceptive device – and the headaches have gotten worse. Almost every day, like when I was pregnant. Yesterday, it was brutal.
My head throbbing so bad and keeling over with stomach cramps, I was off work at 6 and by 6:44 had supper on the table for Princess D and I was in bed. Lying in darkness waiting for my next Mommy Duty.
Bedtime came at 7:30 so I called to my darling 6 year old to get ready, to which she came storming in the room to tell me she wasn’t tired.
“Look at me,” I said softly, “Mommy’s not feeling well.”
She stopped. Everything about her mood changed. Climbing into bed beside me, she started rubbing my hair and telling me it will be alright. Then she started massaging my neck and rubbing my forehead. Next she was kissing my neck and my shoulder blades as she continued to whisper reassuring words, trying to soothe me to sleep.
Even through the pain I couldn’t help smile. This was exactly what I do to her when she is not feeling well. The kisses are the same pattern as the ones I smother her with every night during her 2 minutes of snuggle time. My little princess was trying to mother me like I mother her, attempting to make me feel better and it did put a smile on my weary face.
A couple of hours later Princess D is snoring and sound asleep, lying half on top of me in the middle of the bed, effectively pushing me off as she does every night when she sneaks into my room. My little mother has turned back to my little girl, and I have to smile again. It’s all about her once more, but I know that deep in her little heart she is learning how to be caring and compassionate and that makes me proud beyond measure.